Just Who Do You Think I Am?

Some people think they know you. You just met them five minutes ago; yet they can tell everything about you. Hell, they know you better than you know yourself.

For example: I'm in the old waterin' hole one night when a group of people come through the door. A couple of them are regulars (and dart players) and one is a former beertender there that I had only seen twice before and said about six words to ever. "Get me a Bud." and "Another here." I think, before shift change brought in a different waitress. When she comes in she says: "Oh, there's Gary!" (I couldn't even remember her name) and proceeds to stagger over to where I am seated and give me a hug. Being the polite asshole I am; I said hi to her and then turned my back to her and began talking with someone else. She then plops down beside me and starts in on me about how great a guy I am and that I really should come over to the other side of the bar and play darts with them. Her first mistake is: Neither of the guys she came in with wanted me to come over and play darts because they can't beat me and they know it. Secondly, I am not too keen on being touched by strangers (unless I am paying them to touch me .......... [I like a good massage, once in a while]). I am definitely not a hugger of them. Third. The crap compliments she was spewing my way, made the friend, who was with me, almost fall off his bar stool laughing! Anyone who really knew me, probably, wouldn't be complimenting me (perfectionist/superiority complex) about how nice and great a guy I am. I am a superior asshole (see previous posts if you don't understand).

While I am a nice guy on here; I'm sure that most of you would not like me too well in person. I just have a way of pissing most people off. I know this was her lame attempt at flirting. Which, if she really knew me, wouldn't have been happening either! I've been with the same woman for 22 years and ain't planning on leaving her, just yet. What's that song by Robert Earl Keene? "Rich, Young, Dumb Nymphomaniac" She probably qualifies on the last 3 parts of the title, but not the first. But who am I to say. I DON'T REALLY KNOW HER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!